10 Ways to Become a Grocery Guru

I play with pineapples. I try to juggle jugs of water unsuccessfully. I'm the most interesting man in the grocery store. ūüėÜ Seriously, because I spend so much time in a grocery store I learned some valuable tips that may help you "suffer through" the experience.¬† Some are funny, some are serious.¬† But they ALL will do the trick.¬† Enjoy.


10.  Start a love affair with your freezer.  When you make a recipe, double it  and put the extra in the freezer.  You'll be glad it's there that night nothing goes right. 

9.  Burn some extra calories in line by jumping on the conveyor belt and using it like a treadmill. Push the produce to the side and tell the cashier to crank the belt up to 6.0.  You can't do inclines, but you'll feel the burn.

8.  Follow your favorite brands on Twitter and friend them on Facebook.  You'll find some great bargains and coupons this way.

7.  Unload your feelings on the lady giving out free samples.  It's like free therapy.  She's stuck there and can't leave no matter how hard you cry.

6.  Identify the foods you can prepare more cheaply at home.  There's no need to buy prepared pudding and tea when they're simple and inexpensive to make yourself.

5.  If you pour Red Bull on a pigeon it grows extra wings.  DON'T DO IT!  It'll look weird and the other pigeons will make fun of them.

4.  Do a 5-minute inventory of your refrigerator at least once a week.  Find a use for everything before it goes bad.  Toss wilting vegetables into a pot of soup or spaghetti sauce.  Freeze leftovers for another day and ripe bananas for banana bread or smoothies.

3.  Accidentally buy the chips your spouse doesn't like so you don't have to share them. I don't share food and you shouldn't have to.

2.  Check unit prices or prices per serving.  Search high and low because often the least expensive items are on the top and bottom shelves.

1.  "Can I spaghetti your number?" is a great pickup line!  Okay, I've never picked someone up in a grocery store but I'm sure if stand next to the sauce and start shouting it you're bound to find success.


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